Let’s talk about sex.

We live in a world where sex seems to be everywhere, but when it comes to having an honest conversation about it, we don’t know where to start.

Sex is rampant in the media from porn to 50 shades to primetime love scenes to steamy magazine covers at the grocery checkout line. All this cultural exposure to different ideas of sex has created some unhealthy expectations and frustrations in the bedroom. For more on this, check out my popular post on “The truth about porn” by clicking here.

I work with married couples everyday and I believe there’s a widespread crisis when it comes to modern marriages. Much of this crisis is rooted by what’s happening (or what’s not happening) in the bedroom. It takes more than a healthy sex life to build a healthy marriage, but I believe it’s nearly impossible to build a healthy marriage without it!

I’m convinced that most married couples are unhappy with their sex lives, but they don’t know how to improve it.

If you are one of the many couples who wants to improve the sexual intimacy and satisfaction in your marriage, but you’re not sure where to start, here are some simple ways to begin the conversation with each other:

1. Be specific about what you like (and what you don’t like).

Your spouse is not a mindreader. Tell him/her plainly what you’re thinking, what you’re desiring, what makes you uncomfortable, etc. Communication is the foundation for intimacy. Don’t be demanding. Just share your feelings and encourage your spouse to do the same. You both may learn something new about each other which could lead to a deeper level of intimacy inside and outside the bedroom.

2. Tell your secrets.

Secrecy is an enemy of intimacy. Be completely transparent with each other about everything including your sexual pasts, your current struggles, your fantasies and your fears. “Nakedness” in marriage isn’t just physical; it must also be emotional. Full honesty and transparency will help you connect on every level and will enhance your sex life as well.

3. Talk about it with other people who share your values.

We want to provide a safe place for couples to engage in these conversations with each other, so my wife, Ashley, and I along with Craig and Jeanette Gross are hosting a series of FREE, live call-in conversations for any couple who has purchased our “Best Sex Life Now” program.

We’d love for you to join the conversation! To learn more about this interactive experience, please register by clicking here.

This unique format will allow all those who have purchased the course to ask questions, share struggles and engage in meaningful conversations with us and with each other. Even for those who only listen in and don’t participate in the talking, it’s our hope that these dialogues will provide a healthy new perspective and vitality to the sexual intimacy in all the marriages represented.

For ongoing encouragement to bring more health and happiness to your relationships and your life, please connect with me on my new Facebook page by clicking here.

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