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One of the greatest challenges in marriage is navigating the differences between the typical male thought process and the typical female thought process. God (in His wisdom and His sense of humor) gave men and women very different perspectives. When these differences are understood, the husband and wife can harmonize with each other and see the world with more depth and perspective than either can could do alone.

To help you ladies understand the mind of your man, I’ve listed below the main things that seem to dominate our thoughts. I hope these insights spark some rich conversations in your marriage. Since I’m obviously not an expert on what women think, I’m going to try to talk my amazing wife, Ashley into share the secrets of a wife’s thoughts on her blog.

If your husband is like most guys, his thought are probably dominated by…

(In no particular order)

1. Concern for your happiness.

This one might surprise you, but most husbands can never be happier than they believe their wife is. Your happiness, contentment and joy is of the utmost importance. Sometimes our own selfishness and pride gets in the way, but your happiness is a consistent thought. When you are unhappy (or you seem unhappy), we’ll try to figure out how to make it right.

2. SEX.

This one probably isn’t a shocker, but we actually think about sex even more than you think we do. It dominates our thoughts. In fact, most of us wish we could dial down our mental sex drive. We’ll often gauge the health of our marriage based on the health of our sex life.

For tools to help you improve sexual intimacy within your marriage, check out our new video series, “Best Sex Life Now,” by clicking here.

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3. How to achieve more.

Most guys are results-driven, and even if your husband has achieved “success” in life, chances are he still feels like he doesn’t measure up in certain areas. Men can be (to a fault) driven to achieve. Engage with your husband in conversation about his goals and dreams and remind him that healthy relationships, not trophies or money, are the ultimate measure of success. We guys need to be reminded of this often.

Please encourage your husband to read this post on “Trophy Wife: A message for husbands” by clicking here.

4. Searching for peace.

Men tend to crave silence and solitude in a way most women do not. Men tend to mentally recharge through silence and contemplation while women tend to recharge through conversation and engagement. Again, these are generalizations which don’t apply to every individual, but I’ve observed them to be true in a majority of couples.

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