Prep Time In the Bathroom Could Pay Off In the Bedroom

By Shaunti Feldhahn on August 11, 2014

Dear Shaunti: I used to really look forward to our Friday night date nights, but they’ve become a source of tension. For meetings at work, my wife is spot on time. But for our dates, she takes SO LONG getting…

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Hard Truths are Still True: Taking Care of Yourself Shows You Care for Your Marriage

By Shaunti Feldhahn on April 7, 2014

Dear Shaunti,

I can hardly write this, I’m so upset by one of your columns. You shared that it was important for a woman to “take care of herself” for her husband, and that it was “the effort that mattered” not the results. First of all, this is a dangerous throwback to 1950’s America where the little woman was supposed to greet the conquering hero at the door in a skirt and high heels. The notion that a woman should have to do that makes me sick. But more important, I am deeply skeptical of your contention that the effort is what matters to men. Any man who says he wants his wife to take care of herself, is really saying that he wants the Sports Illustrated supermodel and if she doesn’t meet that standard, it’s time to trade her in for a newer model. I cannot believe that someone with your experience and education would be so susceptible to misogynistic propaganda. How can you possibly defend what these men are saying?

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Let's Get Physical: Health Body, Healthy Marriage

By Shaunti Feldhahn on March 17, 2014

Dear Shaunti, I am definitely not the size I was when I married my husband. But honestly, 4 kids and 25 years later, I don’t see it ever happening. The problem is that I recently overheard my brother saying something…

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Good Dates Begin With Good Compliments

By Shaunti Feldhahn on March 6, 2014

Dear Shaunti, I’m in deep soup with my wife, and I don’t know why. We went out for a really nice dinner last night – an actual date without the kids. We were both excited about it beforehand, but by…

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